Verse 41

 

Translation

O Friend of the destitute! O One and only Ocean of mercy! Without Your darshan my days are accursed! Alas! Alas! How will I spend these days? 41.

rila Krishnadâs Kavirâj Goswâmipâd has explained in his Sâranga-Rangadâ purport that once again when Sri Krishna disappeared from Srimati Râdhârâni’s vision, She was scorched by the fire of viraha that surged inside Her bosom. She considered one moment equal to a hundred yugs. In this state She became delirious and Sri Lilâshuk is echoing Her feelings in this verse.

Srimati is saying – “O Hare! In Your viraha I feel one moment equal to ten million kalpas. These moments are cursed and I don’t know how to spend the time. ‘Hâ’ and ‘hanta’ signify ‘distress’ and ‘sorrow’ respectively. She utters ‘Hâ hanta! Hâ hanta!’ twice to express Her intense sorrow and distress. You please instruct me how I should spend these days and nights in Your absence!

It is only the mahâbhâv-full Vraja-beauties who experience so much anguish in Sri Krishna’s absence that they feel one moment equal to one kalpa, and they are so much joyous in His presence that one kalpa becomes one moment. Sri Krishna said to Uddhav-

“O Uddhav! The Gopis love me so much that when I was in Vrindâvan they felt all their nights equal to half a moment. Now in my absence half a moment has become one kalpa.”

– (Srimad-Bhâgavatam11.12.11)

Sri Krishna may say-

“patayash-cha vah vichinvanti.” – (Srimad-Bhâgavatam10.29.20)

Meaning – (during Mahârâs Sri Krishna rejected the Gopis saying) – “Not finding you all at home your husbands are searching for you, please return to them.”

In reply the Gopis prayed-

“O Krishna! You are the supreme Friend of everybody, You are the soul, eternally loving and all conscientious; intelligent people love You alone. Husbands and children cause sorrow. There is no need to keep any connection with them.”

– (Srimad-Bhâgavatam10.29.33.)

Similarly Sri Râdhâ said, “O Friend of the destitute! We are orphans and our husbands have discarded us. We are impoverished and You are our only Friend.”

Sri Krishna may say –

“bharttuh shushrunam strinam paro dharmo hi-mayaya.”

– (Srimad-Bhâgavatam.10.29.24.)

Meaning- “It is the supreme dharma of all chaste women to serve their husbands sincerely.” (So please serve your husband).

In reply she said-

“chitta sukhena bhava-tap-apahritam.”

– (Srimad-Bhâgavatam10.29.34.)

Meaning – “Dear Krishna! You have dragged our innermost minds towards You so easily, otherwise we were happily engrossed in household chores.” (O Hare! One Who steals the heart and the senses! It is all Your fault, not ours).

Sri Krishna may say – “You all are fickle and lustful, but I am learned in dharma. How can I do such a thing?”

She replied-

“O You Who are the reliever of all woes! We have left our homes to serve Your lotus-feet. We seek shelter of Your lotus-feet. Please be happy with us.” – (Srimad-Bhâgavatam10.29.38.)

Râdhârâni said with humility, “O One and only Ocean of mercy! Please cross the boundary of dharma and take mercy on us.”

Sriman-Mahâprabhu relished this verse and explained its sweetness–

“Without Your darshan, these nights and days are accursed; the time does not glide by. O Friend of the destitute! O infinite Ocean of mercy! Please give me darshan.

While He spoke in this manner, His mood became restless, He was agitated and His heart was scorched in Krishna’s absence. He started asking Krishna – ‘How will I get Your darshan? You tell me the way’.”

– (Sri Chaitanya-Charitâmrita – Madhya.2.51-52)

Sriman-Mahâprabhu uttered in the mood of virahini Sri Râdhâ-

“yugyitam nimeshena chakshusha pravrishayitam,

shunyayitan jagat sarvang govinda-virahena me.”

– (Sri Shikshâshtakam)

Sriman-Mahâprabhu has Himself explained this verse in the following manner-

“My heart is so anxious that I cannot spend the day; one moment appears like a yug, my eyes pour tears like torrential rain in monsoon, the universe appears empty and my heart is smouldering in the fire of Govinda-viraha! How will I survive?”

– (Sri Chaitanya-Charitâmrita –Antya.20.31-32)

Srila Vidyâpati Thâkur has echoed the feelings of virahini Sri Râdhâ-

“Now Mâdhav has gone to Mathurâ – the people of Mathurâ have stolen the jewel of Gokul, flooding it with tears of sorrow. The homes became empty, the town became empty, all quarters became empty and the whole world became empty.

How shall I ever go near the Yamunâ? How shall I ever behold the flower-groves? (In Krishna’s absence I cannot bear to visit these places). I cannot help remembering how we used put up flower boughs to decorate the kunja together. I’ll die if I see it now.

Vidyâpati says (in anger and misery) – just see the fun – She is burning in viraha while Kânhâ is enjoying Himself at Mathurâ!”

In the siddha-swarup Sri Lilâshuk is saying in the mood of Sri Râdhâ’s sakhi, “How will I spend these condemned days and nights without beholding You sporting with Sri Râdhâ?”

In the sâdhak state Sri Lilâshuk is expressing excessive longing for Sri Krishna’s darshan. In His absence he is once again lamenting – those same heart-rending cries! Only a loving devotee knows how one bides the time in the absence of his Dearest One. No one else can appreciate his feelings. Sri Krishna Himself has aroused this longing in Sri Lilâshuk. Undoubtedly he is most fortunate. It is not possible to feel so much longing for the nectarine Sri Krishna if there is no Krishna-prem in the heart. He is indeed blessed.

“Even if someone is the poorest person in the entire universe, but his heart is full of Sri Hari-bhakti, he alone is blessed. Sri Hari too leaves His personal abode, enters his heart and lives there forever and ever since He gets tied up with the cord of bhakti.”

– (Glory of Srimad-Bhâgavatam as told in Sri Padma-purân)

In this material world people are crazy for wealth, respect and power. If there is one day, when, in spite of all effort they can not obtain any of these they consider that day worthless. Suppose a hunter roams whole day in the forest and still does not kill any animal, he thinks that day is cursed. If a businessman cannot cheat and wheedle some money out of someone he thinks that day is cursed. Every material person thinks the day has gone waste if he cannot obtain whatever he desires. But a Krishna devotee is very much different from these people. He is not interested in fan-following, money, fame or power. In fact he gets rid of all these and immerses himself in the only desirable object,

If we spend a single day without relishing Sri Krishna’s Holy Name, His beauty and His sweet pastimes, we should consider ourselves to be most unfortunate and curse that day.

that is the lotus-feet of Sri Krishna, Who is everybody’s Beloved.

However Sri Lilâshuk is full of supreme anurâg. So his hope, expectation and desire are different. His innermost mind is attracted by the sweetly brilliant form of an inexpressible ethereal Divine Being. He is relishing His infinite sweetness all day and night. He is engrossed in drinking that nectar constantly, and yet he is thirsty for more! This thirst is never going to end.

“trishna shanti nohe trishna badhe nirantar”

Meaning – “This thirst is never quenched, it is ever-increasing.”

– (Sri Chaitanya-Charitâmrita)

His poetry is full of eternal craving. It is like the flow of the perennial rivers Gangâ and Yamunâ. It is rushing like these rivers towards the ocean that is Sri Krishna!

In Neelâchal Sriman-Mahâprabhu was always in the mood of Sri Râdhâ. When He was travelling in South India, He heard the echoes of His agitated viraha–full heart from the throes of Sri Krishna-Karnâmritam. He brought back this gem of a text and gifted it to His devotees. Srila Kavirâj Goswâmipâd writes in this context – “There is nothing like Sri Krishna-Karnâmritam in the three worlds. It enables us to gain pure Krishna–prem. One who reads Sri Krishna-Karnâmritam everyday realizes how sweet and beautiful Sri Krishna is.^[1]

“The Lord brought these two great jewels, that is, Sri Brahma-Samhitâ and Sri Krishna-Karnâmritam with Him when He returned from South India.”

– (Sri Chaitanya-Charitâmrita- Madhya.9.279-281)

In Neelâchal the Lord relished some Rasa–granthas in the mood of virahini Sri Râdhâ and Sri Krishna-Karnâmritam was one of them.

“Mahâprabhu sang and heard the compositions of Chandidâs, Vidyâpati, Râmânanda Roy and Sri Krishna-Karnâmritam all day and night most blissfully in the company of Sri Swarup Dâmodar and Sri Râmânanda Roy.”^[2]

– (Sri Chaitanya-Charitâmrita- Madhya.2.56.)

Srila Bhatta Goswâmipâd has written in his purport to this verse that Sri Lilâshuk is extremely thirsty for Sri Krishna’s darshan. He is in misery and cannot tolerate the delay caused by his prârabdha. Actually a devotee never has to suffer from prârabdha. Just as a piece of iron turns into gold when it comes in contact with a touch stone, a devotee’s body mind and soul becomes eternally blissful when he comes in contact with Bhakti devi who is for ever delightful. A devotee experiences joy and sorrow only according to the will of God. A devotee goes through this extraordinary phenomenon as soon as he takes to the path of bhakti.

The Lord said – “The body of a Vaishnav is never material. His body is spiritual and eternally blissful. During dikshâ, the devotee surrenders himself. At that very moment Sri Krishna makes him His own. He makes the devotee’s body eternally blissful. Now the devotee worships His lotus–feet with a spiritual body.”

– (Sri Chaitanya-Charitâmrita – Antya.4.183-185)

However a devotee is very humble. He thinks he has prârabdha. However he never wishes to destroy his prârabdha at all. He appears to suffer sorrows as if he is suffering the fruits of prârabdha. He does this for his own welfare and the welfare of others.

In Sri Brihad-Bhâgavatâmritam we find –

“The honourable devotees who are performing Sri Harinâm-sevâ (that is, chanting the Mahâmantra) tell the world of their sufferings since they are afraid that the great treasure called bhakti will fall in the hands of unqualified people.

As soon as a devotee takes the Holy Name, all his bad qualities and sorrows are destroyed. Even then some devotees, who are as merciful as the Lord Himself, accept sorrows to teach others how to behave properly. Hence a devotee such as King Bharat accepted the association of a deer, to teach us the consequences of material attachment. But actually he was a pure devotee and without any fault, similarly a great devotee such as Yudhisthir Mahârâj indulged in gambling, and Nriga stole a Brahman’s wealth just to teach us how terrible these activities us. We must remember that all these devotees are pure–hearted.”

– ( B.B.2. 3. 170 – 172)

Srila Lilâshuk said, ‘O Hare^[3]! It is Your nature to steal the miseries of Your devotees. How will I spend the days and nights without Your darshan? He is crying ‘Hâ hanta! Hâ hanta!’ He is uttering it twice because his days are miserable, inauspicious, cursed. Every moment his longing is increasing. In Srimad-Bhâgavatam the Gopis have said –

“O Hare! When we don’t see You, one truti^[4] appears like one yug.”

– (Gopi–geet in Srimad-Bhâgavatam 10. 31. 15)

The poet is saying, “Similarly without Your darshan I am finding one moment equal to one day and night. The future appears very dark and terrible How will I spend it?”

He cried in utmost sorrow – O Friend of the destitute! You are my only friend! Only You can save me from this misery and no one else. O Ocean of Mercy! I cannot wait for my prârabdha to end. Please give me darshan immediately.

Srila Chaitanya dâs has made a special comment. He says, ‘dinantarâni’ means ‘those nights that remind me of Your abhisâr’. How will I spend those nights? At night a devotee naturally remembers Vrajadhaam.

It is a monsoon night. Sri Râdhâ is all set for abhisâr. How many obstacles and perils She has to cross before She can engage in Shyâmsundar’s sevâ in that flower–grove situated in the dark and dense forest! The Mahâjan has written –

“Torrential rain was pouring and there was darkness all around. Srimati was worried. She confided in Her friend –”Ohh no sakhi! What shall I do? My abhisâr for Hari seems doubtful. My innermost being is full of the brilliant Shyâmor-chandra (the dark moon). How can I send Kâno a message to stop Him from coming in this night? Even the thought is arresting my agitated heart. The lightning is flashing like firestorm and the thunder is resounding terribly. I cannot remain at home, yet I cannot step outside either. What do I do with all these obstacles? I wish I could give wings to my desire and fly swiftly to Him. Poet Shekhar says – O Precious One, do not worry, You go for abhisâr.”

During the night a very loving devotee longs to meditate on such supremely loving pastimes. the sâdhak is in the mood of a sakhi–manjari, so his ‘chitta’^[5] and ‘mân’^[6] become extremely agitated to enter the Divinely sweet pastimes! 41.

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